Pottery Gossip

Tonight my husband and I spent the evening painting pottery. This is becoming one of our regular date night activities, especially right now when movie selection is so dismal. We go to a place called "As You Wish" I'll share some pictures of what we have painted after we pick up things on Monday.

Tonight a group of girl scouts were there with their parents. Ten, ten yr-olds with their gossiping moms. Well, there was one dad there. He didn't do much gossiping, but he held his own in the real conversation department.

My husband and I sat in our quiet corner and listened to the interactions of the kids and adults for two hours. Let me tell you a bit of what I learned sitting there tonight.

- One woman spent a lot of time worrying over her painting, and was continually sending her daughter to fetch her different colors and brushes. Patience was not her strong suit. Later, we learned she is also the mother of twins who left daddy in charge of the boys tonight. She was less than enthusiastic of dad's parenting skills.

- Another woman was about to make some major changes in her job. She became intensely curious in what other people are earning at their jobs. And how they handle health care at such jobs. She also wondered how another woman who owns a small company handles health care for her employees. It was rather personal things. But they all seemed comfortable sharing it all.

- Another woman was quickly trying to plan a parent's meeting for next Wednesday. She was rather fearful some of the parents would leave before she had the chance to commit them all to coming. She also talked about attending a larger girl scouts meeting. She complained quite a bit about the requirements for some project. I don't know the program so the details eluded me.

- Another woman spent most of her time complimenting the painting of the different parents. She went so far as to declare that the dad had a hidden talent. She went on to explain how her mother had no hobbies until she retired and then took up painting, like Bob Ross. Which of course led to the women giggling over enjoying watching Bob Ross.

-Another woman kept talking about her trip to Hawaii from several years back. I think she felt the need to show she's been there too as another lady had just returned from a trip there.

-The dad talked about how he gets extra benefits at his federal government job because he was in the military. Personally, I think all veterans deserve some sort of continued benefit such as he explained.

-The best part? The hushed conversation when all the girls would be away from the main table. They had to discuss the friend who's husband had just filed for divorce. Of course the friend didn't want anyone but the woman speaking to know, so the speaking woman made sure all the other adults would keep it secret.

It is kinda sad how we women sometimes talk about things we shouldn't. It can make for interesting conversation in the moment, but I found a lot of unfairness and disservice to others in that random conversation I overheard.

How sad for that father of the twins, who is caring for his kids, to be compared to a barely competent babysitter. How sad for the woman getting a divorce to have who she believes are her friends snickering and whispering about how they saw it coming. How sad that little girls were being bossed around, false compliments were being layered all the while everyone was smiling and laughing..I felt very little genuine happiness from the group. I felt competition, comparing, veiled insults, and pressure to conform. And yet, I know they all feel themselves to be great friends. How genuine am I with my friends? How respectful am I when I share things about my husband? How nosy can I be?

I don't know these people. But they offered me a glimpse into myself for a moment. And I feel a renewed commitment, to be careful with my words. Words hold power. I should not wield them carelessly.

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Association (Cherish is the word I use to describe..)

Guess what! I made the very painless switch to the new blogger. I figured I ought to just do it while I had the moment and not wait for the inevitable ultimatum from them. Do it or else you can't log in Muhahahahaha! So, if you notice any problems let me know.

Now to the real post:



Through high school, my best friend's mom sewed. Not just something here and there, she had a part time business where she made dance costumes. My friend would have to help her mom when big orders were due. I'd occasionally pick the stray thread or rhinestone from her clothes. As far as I know they still work this business, but a bit more full time now. When I got married, she was my maid of honor and she made my bridesmaid's dresses as my wedding gift. When I think of sewing I cannot help but have stray thoughts run through my mind about her. They are both excellent seamstresses.

My father was a dentist. I worked with him for a number of years (a decade is a number...). I have also worked in various other dental clinics. I know a lot about the business. Inevitably when I think about my father, who died five years ago, I think about dentistry. After he died, whenever the office where I worked would do denture repairs, the acrylic smell would make me think of my dad. When I was little, he would work on such things on occasion at home. The smell means dad to me. Right after he died, when I would smell it, I would tear up. Others would complain about how nasty it made the office smell, but to me it is a wonderful smell.

My husband works with computers. He has had several different computer positions with the same company for the past 14 years. When we met, we exchanged email addresses and got to know each other through lengthy emails. I would dash into the high tech center at the college I was attending to check and see if he had sent me anything. He would straight out skip class to sit at a computer at the University he was attending to wait for me to reply. We were silly. He is the kind of friend who will spend hours with you solving your computer troubles. (No, I will not give you our phone number...hehe). Computing, emailing and such will always remind me of my dear husband.

I live in Phoenix. I have lived here all of my life. I was born over in John C. Lincoln Hospital. I have visited all of the western states. I have enjoyed northern Arizona's cool greenness. But Phoenix is home. It is a huge place, this Phoenix now. But when I was little, it was much smaller. I have seen this city grow up around me and sometimes I don't recognize her. What with all the violence and depressing stuff in the local news. Despite all that...Phoenix will always be home to me.

There are other places that have strong meanings to me. Seattle means Grandma. Mexico means painting schools (I'll share this story sometime soon). Flagstaff means escape.

Association- the connection or relation of ideas, feelings, sensations, etc.; correlation of elements of perception, reasoning, or the like.

My little boys and I went to the park and met up with some friends today. These wonderful ladies have younger children than I do. So, I ended up giving touches of experiences I have already had with my older children. Mostly, I just explained how I don't stress over things with my little ones like I did with the older ones. Eating vegetables and potty training were the main looks at this. As we were leaving one of my friends called me wise. I said that I didn't think of myself as wise, I've just had experiences they hadn't yet. My friend said isn't that what being wise is all about?

My thoughts this afternoon have been on, how others view me. Who am I in their experiences? Is there something they associate strongly with me? Maybe I'm just the friend with all the kids. I am sure there is something more.

So often when I contemplate how others see me, I am drawn to my imperfections. I magnify in my own thoughts the flaws that I must wave like a flag to the rest of the world. But in reality this isn't how others see me. So, what do I project? I certainly never thought it was wisdom.

So what are your favorite associations you have with people or places?