Independence and Other Things to Be Grateful For!

Happy Independence Day!
I IM'ed a friend in England today and said, Happy Big Loss Day! He didn't quite get it at first. Is my humor really that bad? Maybe you shouldn't answer that.

Good News! My father-in-law woke up! After the neurologist said he'd likely never wake even. So, we went from planning funeral to trying to take care of him again. This is still very difficult and he is still in intensive care. He is still on dialysis, respirator, antibiotics for staph infection and they think he probably suffered a stroke. He is a fighter tho and is not giving up yet. There is hope again and sometimes that is all you can ask for.

In other news! My dear sweet sister, Sharla, guess my question several posts ago. My license plate says: OSHEE. :) There is a story to my name, which I have never shared because it relates to my real first name. Sometime soon, I might just have to tell the story. But, it's been a real nickname for me since I was 15. (Over half my lifetime wow!)
Here is a picture of my new license plate!



The summer continues now with swimming in full force! Swim meets and dive meets every week and practice four times a week. Movies on fridays fill out our week. Everyone in my home is healthy again and things are over all improving. I have much to be grateful for in addition to being born and getting to live in this remarkable country.

What Title Could I Possibly Give This One?

Six and a half years ago, my father had a massive heart attack and died 48 hours later. I have talked in the past about that loss. It is a moment that never fades in my memory. It is a heartache that not only have I continued to work through but I have seen my children discuss and feel the loss of grandpa over they years.

Now, my father-in-law, my children's other grandpa is dying. He has been very ill and in an ICU unit for a couple weeks. Things have progressed poorly and he continues to get worse and need more and more intervention to stay alive. Today the news from the neurologist was not good. So, he is going to be moved to hospice care complete with his ventilator, dialysis needs, brain swelling and sepsis.

There have been positive, hopeful moments through this and we have done our best to keep the kids guardedly informed about Grandpa's condition. Now, it is time to prepare them for his death. Help them say their goodbyes. We didn't have the opportunity for them to say that same goodbye before my father died. I am hoping it will be a positive experience for them in the long run. Still, I am worried for them. I ache for their loss in this.

My father-in-law is a wonderful man. This is commonly said about the dead or dying but truly this man has the heart of an angel. He has a love that encompasses all who have need of him, all he crosses paths with and a love for his family that would bring tears to his eyes in the happy and sad moments. I have often told my husband how very grateful I am that he was raised by such a remarkable man. After my father died, I too leaned on my father-in-law's big shoulders for support. He has in every way been a father to me for the past 13+ years.

If you are the praying sort, or the positive thinking energy sort..please consider adding my children into your prayers tonight. We have a journey to complete with a special man very soon and I so hate saying goodbye.

Association (Cherish is the word I use to describe..)

Guess what! I made the very painless switch to the new blogger. I figured I ought to just do it while I had the moment and not wait for the inevitable ultimatum from them. Do it or else you can't log in Muhahahahaha! So, if you notice any problems let me know.

Now to the real post:



Through high school, my best friend's mom sewed. Not just something here and there, she had a part time business where she made dance costumes. My friend would have to help her mom when big orders were due. I'd occasionally pick the stray thread or rhinestone from her clothes. As far as I know they still work this business, but a bit more full time now. When I got married, she was my maid of honor and she made my bridesmaid's dresses as my wedding gift. When I think of sewing I cannot help but have stray thoughts run through my mind about her. They are both excellent seamstresses.

My father was a dentist. I worked with him for a number of years (a decade is a number...). I have also worked in various other dental clinics. I know a lot about the business. Inevitably when I think about my father, who died five years ago, I think about dentistry. After he died, whenever the office where I worked would do denture repairs, the acrylic smell would make me think of my dad. When I was little, he would work on such things on occasion at home. The smell means dad to me. Right after he died, when I would smell it, I would tear up. Others would complain about how nasty it made the office smell, but to me it is a wonderful smell.

My husband works with computers. He has had several different computer positions with the same company for the past 14 years. When we met, we exchanged email addresses and got to know each other through lengthy emails. I would dash into the high tech center at the college I was attending to check and see if he had sent me anything. He would straight out skip class to sit at a computer at the University he was attending to wait for me to reply. We were silly. He is the kind of friend who will spend hours with you solving your computer troubles. (No, I will not give you our phone number...hehe). Computing, emailing and such will always remind me of my dear husband.

I live in Phoenix. I have lived here all of my life. I was born over in John C. Lincoln Hospital. I have visited all of the western states. I have enjoyed northern Arizona's cool greenness. But Phoenix is home. It is a huge place, this Phoenix now. But when I was little, it was much smaller. I have seen this city grow up around me and sometimes I don't recognize her. What with all the violence and depressing stuff in the local news. Despite all that...Phoenix will always be home to me.

There are other places that have strong meanings to me. Seattle means Grandma. Mexico means painting schools (I'll share this story sometime soon). Flagstaff means escape.

Association- the connection or relation of ideas, feelings, sensations, etc.; correlation of elements of perception, reasoning, or the like.

My little boys and I went to the park and met up with some friends today. These wonderful ladies have younger children than I do. So, I ended up giving touches of experiences I have already had with my older children. Mostly, I just explained how I don't stress over things with my little ones like I did with the older ones. Eating vegetables and potty training were the main looks at this. As we were leaving one of my friends called me wise. I said that I didn't think of myself as wise, I've just had experiences they hadn't yet. My friend said isn't that what being wise is all about?

My thoughts this afternoon have been on, how others view me. Who am I in their experiences? Is there something they associate strongly with me? Maybe I'm just the friend with all the kids. I am sure there is something more.

So often when I contemplate how others see me, I am drawn to my imperfections. I magnify in my own thoughts the flaws that I must wave like a flag to the rest of the world. But in reality this isn't how others see me. So, what do I project? I certainly never thought it was wisdom.

So what are your favorite associations you have with people or places?