Why Aren't I Crying?

Today I wanted to cry. I wanted to cry long and hard and get all the frustration to spill out of me with the tears. I didn't cry. I didn't even tear up. Instead, I sat and thought through the experience. The more I considered the different angles the less frustrated I was and eventually it faded enough that I was fine.

We (my husband and I) have managed to lose our only remaining key to our van. This van is our only vehicle. And now, we have no key to it. The key has an embedded chip and so it was never a simple thing to get a copy.

Today, I had to get to a Cub Scout meeting and no means of getting there as I discovered the key was gone. A dear friend who has a son in the pack offered to pick me up and take me. As I had planned all the activities, I thought this was the only way to make sure Cub Scouts still happened today.

On the way to the church where we meet, her car overheated. Her husband had to come rescue us. We left him with the overheated car and continued on to the meeting. I was 40 min late for the 1 hr meeting. All I could do was laugh. It was so surreal.

Back home after all the boys were finally picked up from the nonmeeting, the search restarted for the lost key. We cleaned and searched for three hours. We still have no key.

See, I deserve a sob session.

But it hasn't come. I don't think it will. I am now, just very very tired and am faced with having to somehow get new keys tomorrow.

So, why no tears?

Because I am loved. I had help at every step of the way today. Every single person was understanding and everyone was safe. That is all I can see. I see the faces of my sympathetic friends. I see my children working to clean up the messes I made searching for the key. I am so blessed. How can I cry?