Blogging and Toddlers

It seems blogger is giving fits and won't allow comments right now.

It could just be their way of 'encouraging' me to switch to the beta..but I am currently working toward actually moving to another blogging system. I am also in the midst of changing web hosting service. As a result, this blog as it is, gets to limp along for awhile until I am ready for the big changes.

Thank you for continuing to visit despite the difficulties.

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I spent the morning playing with my toddlers. I finally feel free to call them both toddlers since my 14 mo-old took his foot steps the other night. He is a strong little boy and stands up and squats all the time with no hand holds. He has been very hesitant to walk, however. If I try to get him to stand he lifts his legs up so I can only place him down sitting. If I try to get him to take steps after he has stood up on his own, he drops and crawls even if it is just a half foot distance away. He has been rather stubborn about all of this. So, of course, his first steps did not involve me at all. I was across the room holding the 2 1/2 yr-old. He wanted Grandma to pick him up, but she was in the middle of being Cub Master at the Pack Meeting. Since he wasn't getting picked up, he turned and took two steps to a nearby chair. I missed it of course. I saw him with my mom, and then a moment later I saw him at the chair. She confirmed with me later he had actually taken the steps. The moral of this story? My baby is already deciding the timing of his life. I can't wait to start potty training him. Ugh! I sense that will have to be his doing too.

I have started training the 2 1/2 yr-old. He just has yet to actually do anything on the toilet besides play with himself. LOL..He is a curious little boy. He does like to remove his diaper after a good poo though. Ah the wonders of a new phase. He has started talking more. The doctor was a touch concerned because at his 2 yr check up he wasn't saying all that much and wasn't really putting two words together very well. He now is blossoming. His current favorite word is Apple. We have a couple of books centered around an apple theme, he carries them around with him everywhere. He thrusts them at unsuspecting readers and says, "Apple!". He says the word clearly. Maybe the whole speaking thing has been the obstacle with potty training. He can't tell me, "But Mom, all I want to do is sit here and play with myself. Please stop encouraging me to make faces and push." LOL..Parents through the eyes of a toddler are probably hilarious things.

Tonight is my writing class. Tomorrow my first soccer practice. Nap times are never long enough. Always so much to sit here and do at this computer of mine. (Altho you see I am blogging first. I am so dedicated. He he he.)

The Late Night Walk Part 2

It seems I have had to take an unsecheduled break from blogging. It is a consequence of all these things I've signed up to help with. I did want to share the next scene from my story. The stilletto late-night walker one. After having sat with my critique group, it has come to my attention that there are parts of the story that need a lot of help, but I am not going to point them out to you. After all, maybe you are more like me and enjoy it just the way it is. :-)

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THE LATE NIGHT WALK Part 2

Joe drove slowly down the silent street, turning his headlights off as he neared the park. He had lost her in the darkness. He sat there eyes squinted behind his bifocals looking around. His eyes scan over the play equipment, the baseball diamond and settle on the basketball court. The court is lit by one flickering lamp and walking around the cracked surface is Mindell.

He watches her walk from one corner of the concrete slab to the other. She is walking in the same pose as the night before. One hand is out, palm down, fingers stiff. Her other hand rests on her hip as now her insolated mug is resting in the grass near the sputtering light. On her feet are the same pair of gold heels she’s worn during her late night walks for a week now. She switches from straight walking to creating intricate designs with her footsteps.

Joe frowns, his eyebrows knotting together as he takes off his glasses and rubs his weary eyes with one hand. He looks back up to find her leaving the park, walking back around the block toward her house. Joe waits until she is safely around the corner and then starts his car and drives back the way he came. He makes it back in front of his living room window just as she comes up the street.

* * *
Joe shuffles into the kitchen the morning sun brightly shining through the breakfast nook windows. He leans against a kitchen chair, yawns loudly as he scratches his lower back.
Bella turns from the sink, shutting off the water. “Joe, you startled me! Are you feeling alright?”

“Of course.” He drops into the chair, his battered robe catching on the corner of the table. He pulls it free and it tears. “Ah hell! How about some of that coffee I smell. Morning hurts.”

Bella smiles warmly and brings him a steaming mug. She sits at the table watching him open his sweet n low packets. She waits as he folds the four pink rectangles together and flicks them across the table. “What has you up so early?”

“Didn’t you tell me that woman leaves in the morning with her kids?” Joe motioned to the living room window.

“Yes. Does this mean she was at it again last night? Even so, she’s already left for the day. They are early risers over in that house. Up with the sun she must be. I wonder that she gets any sleep at all, what with her late night walks.”

“I followed her last night.”

“What? You went for a walk? Joe, you know better, what if you had fallen? Your hip has been so bad since it started getting colder. The doctor warned you about long walks. I can’t believe you went traipsing around the neighborhood, especially after we both agreed that she was nuts to be out there like that. What were you. . .” She trails off as Joe holds up a hand. “Was I doing it again?”

Joe nods. “I followed her in the car.”

“Didn’t she see you?”

With a shake of his head Joe recounts the way she was walking over the basketball court. He traced his finger on the kitchen table to demonstrate the different patterns she walked. “Does it mean anything to you?”

“I can’t think of any reason for it either. This is certainly turning into quite the mystery. You are sure she didn’t see you? I don’t want you taken for a stalker or anything.”

“I can be as sneaky as you when I put my mind to it, Bella.” Joe smiled at his wife over his coffee cup.

Bella a bit flushed now could only wave her dishtowel at him in response.

“What’s the plan for today?” Joe said.

“What? Oh, you aren’t going back to bed?”

“Nah, I’m up now. You’re stuck with me.”

“Well, you know that faucet in the guest bathroom hasn’t been working right for months. And the screen over the back window is loose. Let me get a pad to make a list.” Bella stands and rummages through a drawer in the kitchen.

Joe laughes. “Can I shower first?”

Birthday Thoughts

Today is my sister's birthday. She would be 32 years-old. Her name is Heather. She had a short life, but a life much longer than any of her doctors' predicted. She blessed her family very much. There have been countless times in my life I wished I could remember her. I know she had severe health issues and mentally was never as old as her chronological age. But I wish I could remember holding her hand. Kissing her cheek. Laughing with her.

When I was younger, I thought about her all the time. I felt connected to her. I would tell friends at school all about her. About the pictures I'd seen, the feelings I had. Rarely were my feelings understood properly by the other children. I learned, for the most part, they aren't feelings for sharing.

When my dad died, I felt connected to her again. I could almost feel her hugging him. I could almost feel her happiness at being with him again. It made me happy they were together.

I suppose, I've always felt connected. I named my first child after her, middle name too.

I was watching a show about medical mysteries a couple of weeks ago and they were interviewing a conjoined twin. She and her sister had been seperated as babies and her sister hadn't survived. The surviving twin explained how she has always felt like her sister is with her always. That a part of the sister lives on inside of her body. I thought that was beautiful. And though we were never physically joined like that, it reminded me how I used to talk to Heather. At night, when I was lonely or sad, I'd think about her and not feel so alone. Even though, I couldn't really remember her.

I don't talk to her anymore. Maybe I should. Adulthood has taken over and I rarely think of her anymore. Still, I love her. Happy Birthday Heather.

I'm So Blue

Your Aura is Blue

Your Personality: Your natural warmth and intuition nurtures those around you. You are accepting and always follow your heart. You in Love: Relationships are your top priority, and this includes love. You are most happy when you are serious with someone. Your Career: You need to help others in your job to feel satistifed. You would be a great nurse, psychologist, or counselor.

What Color Is Your Aura?

This one surprised me with its accuracy. Are you blue too?

I found this over at Jana's blog. Go check her out. She draws naked people.

Woe's of a Soccer Mom/Coach?

I think it is now official. All previous diagnoses aside. I am a nut. I am looney. I am absolutely certifiable. I am as crazy as they come. Whoo Hooo!

Tell me on what planet do I live? Because suddenly I was struck with the impression that there are more that 24 hours in a day. There are more than 7 days in a week. More than 30 days in a month. There is more than 30 days in a month?? When'd they start that one? ;-)

Have I told you I'm taking a demanding writing class? Lots of work to do for it every week. Oh, I told you that? Ok.

Have I told you I'm a Cub Scout leader? I have? Ah well..we meet weekly. It is all very new for me. So much to learn. And ya know what? My wonderful, sweet 8 yr-old little boy..is very calm compared to some of the other boys I am now working with. He's such a good boy.

I got a call yesterday...I'm certain this part is new. See...soccer season is starting for my three oldest. It is through the city and a very good program run by volunteer coaches. Catch that? Volunteer coaches. Yep..they called me. Practically begging me to coach my 6 yr-olds team. I said no. Aren't you proud of me? I said no. But then I called back today. I said yes. My kids have enjoyed the program for two great seasons. How could I just say no, when my mind kept telling me that I could squeeze it in?? Huh?? Tell me?? I just never win the arguments with myself.

This never-played-soccer-before-she-had-children-on-a-soccer-team-mom, is now Coach! HA! Maybe I'll be so bad they won't ask me again. I suddenly find myself lacking in way too many skills here. I know I can learn...I can. I wouldn't agree to do all this new stuff if I didn't think I could do it. But I played softball growing up, not soccer.

Where's Dad in all this you may wonder? And if not..wonder for a moment for me...

He's supporting this crazy lady he married in all of it. His work hours make such volunteering very difficult. But you know that one Saturday in October I've already completely committed myself to a church activity? He's gonna be coaching soccer.

The important part of all of this..(at least I keep telling myself this..) is that I am not alone in any of it. I have help at Cub Scouts (from a very pregnant co-leader but she is cool and great with the boys...). I have help at soccer..not just my husband but also the other coach I conned am sharing practice time with. At the same park, same age group, same time. The idea is we can let the kids scrimmage at the end of the practice.

The writing..well that I'm pretty much on my own for. (Who would I really want to help me with it anyway? I type at least twice as fast as my sweet husband). On a brightside ..I am getting a huge kick out of the story I am working on. It helps the writing go much quicker. If only I could get through the critiques as quick.

Happy Pirating!

Hey I just learned something really important!

Today is a holiday! It is The International Talk Like A Pirate Day!
My BIL was kind enough to inform me. I thought about writing this post all in pirate speak but as you will see from my test results below I make a lousy pirate. LOL

Remember to throw in the occasional Arr! or Arrgh! or Yarr! or Yarrgh! today. (all are acceptable according to the FAQ's at the above linked site...)


HAPPY TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY



Here are my test results..how did you do?

You are a Pirate Second Class

Do you remember the last time you took
a chance? I do. It was when you decided
to leave the security of your mother's womb
and headed for the bright light. It's time
to head for the next bright light, my friend.
Creativity is not your strong suit. You
are good at doing what you are told to do
and that, in itself, is a gift. It's not a
gift to you, mind you, but rather a gift to
those who will be there to tell you what
to do. You like long walks on the beach and
cuddling, but would never admit that to your
Guy friends who think you are okay but can't
always remember your name. Tapioca pudding
seems a bit extreme for a fellow such as
yerself, what with all the bumps and stuff.
It's a good thing ye be on a pirate ship,
otherwise, ye'd would be walkin' because ye be
positively pedestrian. Have a nice day.

What's Yer Inner Pirate?
brought to you by The Official Talk Like A Pirate Web Site. Arrrrr!

Animal Tracks

I am the mother of a cub scout. It has been slow going so far with the program. But he really enjoys it and looks forward to his meetings each week. A couple of weeks ago, I learned I get to be the new Den Leader. I really was happy letting other people do this job, only not that much of the job was getting done. So, now that I have this opportunity, I figure I ought to make sure the program is running as it should be. Learning what I need to know has been occupying my thoughts to the point that blogging about other things has been impossible. So, I will blog about cub scouts.

I get to run my first den meeting tomorrow. As I have come into this month half way through, there is no way I can get everything ready for the field trip to the zoo that the program recommends for this week. I have decided then instead to bring the zoo or at least the animals to the boys. I am leaning on this site "Beartracker's Animal Tracks Den" to get all the information I need to have the boys following animal tracks all around. If you want to know all about animal tracks, go take a peak!

It is interesting to me that teaching 8 and 9 year-old boys can make me nervous. An hour a week is all. It is probably the worry over following the program and getting the boys to earn advancements that creates this nervousness. Still, it's only seven boys. They are good kids too. (Mostly...)

Wish me luck!

Movie Night

Tonight we all went to the drive-ins. It is always a step back in time when we go there. We saw a double-feature as we all sat out in our camp chairs. We saw Everyone's Hero and Monster House . Monster House was a bit scarier than I expected. Our six year-old had to be held with her face away through some of the middle part.

The weather here has turned. It only hit 90°F today and so by the time the movies began at 8pm it was beautiful out. We had the windows down as we drove home. The past several years summer has not fled in time for Fall. I hope today is only the start of wonderful weather for the next six months. Hey, I can hope.

It really made for one of the best nights this family has enjoyed together in a long time.

One note though...

If you arrive late to the movie at a drive-in? Please, oh pretty please with a cherry on top, do not drive through every row of cars as you search for the open spot in the middle of the front. Then, please, do not turn your headlights to face all the people watching the film and sit there as you figure out what you are doing. If you are late, sit in the back. Then you won't have to leave the lights on, blind the movie watchers or even worry about hitting kids as you treasure hunt for the best remaining parking spot. Thank you.

Love, Love Changes Everything

I had fallen out of love with my blog. A sad, but true thing.

So..it had to change...or it had to go.

So I changed it. I've had fun experimenting and by no means do I think I am settled on this design, but it will do for now. I see other changes in my future...an exit from blogger perhaps? Web hosting service change? Ah, yes..the future is open before me...I only hope you stick around with me through the ride to finding that love again.

And as the song concludes:

Off into the world we go, planning futures, shaping years.
Love bursts in and suddenly all our wisdom disappears.
Love makes fools of everyone: all the rules we make are broken.
Yes, love, love changes everything: live or perish, in its flame.
Love will never ever let you be the same.

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And because I really ought to here's the credits for the song:
Music: Andrew Lloyd Webber.
Lyrics: Don Black & Charles Hart.
Show: "Aspects of love" (1989).

Writing Gives me Goosebumps

Everyone is where they should be today.

Isn't that a wonderful thing? Husband is at work. Three oldest kids are in school. Two toddlers are here driving me nuts! All is right in the Oshee household once again. To top it off, everyone slept through the night last night. Except me that is. I was up finishing up my homework.

I like having homework. I like having a fiction class. At this point anyway, I am so glad I have stuck with it and grappled with those fears. I am finding with fiction, unlike my personal essays, I am able to be a bit funnier. I can take it all a bit less seriously. I read this by John Salzi recently. In the essay he writes about the book he explains that for this, his first attempt at writing a novel, he decided to:

In sitting down to write the novel, I decided to make it easy on myself. I decided first that I wasn't going to try to write something near and dear to my heart, just a fun story. That way, if I screwed it up (which was a real possibility), it wasn't like I was screwing up the One Story That Mattered To Me. I decided also that the goal of writing the novel was the actual writing of it -- not the selling of it, which is usually the goal of a novelist.

Isn't that a great goal? The goal just to write to see if he could do it. Even more, he decided to write a story that allowed him the ability to let go and be okay if it didn't sell. I read the novel (go to the site you can read it too) and enjoyed it a lot more than I expected to. I have been reading Salzi's blog, Whatever, for sometime and while I don't always agree with him, I enjoy his voice and how he expresses himself. Right now, he is digressing down the road of taping bacon to his cat. I never quite know what to expect there. Can you tell who I've chosen to do my author profile on for my writing class?

After reading that, I have really tried to lighten up with my writing. Hey it worked for him!

Now to where this has been leading. The scene I finished last night is a puzzle. There is an incongruity. I am going to post the short scene here and while I know what I have planned as the solution to the puzzle; I thought it would be fun to see if someone else has a better idea. So, think of yourselves in this as my writing group. As this is a first draft, I'm not looking for heavy editting...just ideas for the solution to the puzzle. I hope you have fun with it!

“Bella, Bella wake up!” Joe shakes his wife firmly. She bolts upright startled, but hasn’t time for much more reaction as Joe rushes her out to the living room.

“Joe…Wha.” She pauses to yawn, “what’s going on?”

Joe pulls her to the large window overlooking the street. Bella struggles into her robe as she drops to the chair.

“Watch Bella!” Joe says and then points down the street.

Bella rubs her puffy eyes and squints in the direction of his finger. “It is past 2 am Joe, it is dark. There isn’t anything to see. Please, let me go back to bed.”

Joe peers intently down the street and then at his wrist watch. “Just a couple more minutes and you’ll see.”

Just then movement can be seen under the streetlamp halfway down the block. Bella frowns and leans closer to the window. “Who is out walking at this time of night?” she says.

“It’s that lady from that house across the street. I’ve been watching her, every night for a week now.”

“Mindell Jacobs? You’ve been watching her? Heavens Joe, have you been spying?” says Bella.

“Just watch!” he says.

The woman then steps out of the shadows and wobbly struts down the sidewalk. In one hand she clenches a insulated mug and her other hand is held delicately out, her palm down, fingers out.

“What does she have on her feet?” says Bella.

“That’s why I woke you. I swear she does this every night about this time. Leaves down the block one way and return back up the other.” Joe gestures to his left and then his right. “Always wearing the same thing. Big baggy sweats and those shoes.”

“They’re called stilettos.” Bella leans forward, wishing now she had brought her glasses. Her eyesight just hasn’t been the same since she hit sixty. “An expensive pair if I am seeing it right. They’ve got to be at least five inches high. Is she wearing any make-up? Her hair looks like it is pulled back but I can’t make out if she has another set of clothes under those sweats. Maybe our little mommy across the street has a side job we don’t know about.”

“Hell, I don’t know anything about make-up, but she doesn’t look like any hooker I’d pick up.”

Bella looks at Joe considering. “You’d pick up hmm?”

“You know what I mean. Her hair is a mess, and the way she holds that hand is more like she’s walking into my mother’s parlor than a strip club.” Joe says.

“You said she does this every night?” Bella says ready to change the topic back.

“Yeah, every night about this time. I noticed the movement about a week ago. I was watching the MASH show that comes on at 1:30. I pulled the blinds up to see better and there she was prancing down the sidewalk. I thought it couldn’t be right and when she was gone from view I stopped paying attention. But hell, she’s kept it up all week.” Joe said.

“Why didn’t you tell me before? It looks like she might just fall over in those shoes.” Bella said.

“She starts off a lot quicker and steadier almost like she’s wearing sneakers. You would have believed me if I mentioned it over brunch at IHOP?” Joe said.

Bella laughs. “No, that isn’t likely is it. Now let me remember, those two are married and have what, three kids now? The youngest is still in diapers.”

“How do you know all that?”

“Because I am awake during the day. I see her load them up in that minivan there every morning. She must work a lot because it is usually the dad that unloads them in the evening.” Bella says.

The lights switch off in the house across the street. “Shows over. So what do you think?” says Joe.

“I think our neighbors are much stranger than I have given them credit for. I am going back to bed now.” Bella stands holding her back. “Are you going to come?”

“No. I’m going to watch Matlock now.”

A Pause in My Scrubbing

For the past two weeks, my house has been full of sickness. It is an exhausting thing. It all started with fever and coughs and now it is nausea/vomiting/diarrhea and fever. I think in the two days I let the kids go back to school they came home with something new.

Today I have begun the task of disinfecting the house. While after the first run of illness, I cleaned and washed, this second round has been so icky I feel like I need to bleach-bomb the house.

Wish me luck on everyone sleeping through the night tonight. The calls of Mommy-Mommy I just threw up...do not make a pleasant lullaby.

Anniversaries...

I know tomorrow is a big anniversary and a lot of bloggers out there are sharing their memories of where they were and what they were doing. I've made the decision not to write about that memory. While the day was a changing day for the world, it honestly has not made a huge impact on my day to day decisions and experiences. I don't want to trivialize what others truly went through by talking about my day at work that day. Instead, that was a time of huge change for me in other ways and I'd like to look back on some of that.


Today is my dad's birthday. He would have been 61. My dad was a big man, 6'3 or so. But he wasn't just tall. He had huge broad shoulders, and square face and head that he had trouble finding hats to fit. His hands were big too. Not his fingers. They weren't especially long. The palms of his hands were tremendous though. My older brother has hands like that too. At the age of two, my brother, was able to palm a basketball.

So, with his large stature and huge grasp on the world what did my father choose as a career? Why a dentist of course. He grew up as the second son of a cotton farmer in southeastern Arizona. He felt through his life that growing up he had to play second fiddle to his older brother. So, my dad left farming and dreamt instead of being a dentist.

He met my mom while in undergrad school and they married and started their family right away. They both ended up attending Washington University in St. Louis. My father was in the dental program, my mom finished up her bachelor's in Physcial Therapy. By the time they moved and settled in Arizona they had three children, their degrees, and a lot of decisions to make.

I am child number four (out of a total nine). I was the first born here in Phoenix. Growing up was not always easy. My dad had trouble dealing with stress well and when he was out of sorts it effected all of us. Dad's mood determined everything in our family dynamics. There were times we were out right afraid and other times he would tickle us and we would happily jump on his lap for our next turn. He played fun games with frisbees, basketballs and footballs. Some of the games became running family jokes through the years. (If we would ask him to pass us something at the dinner table, often he would ask for a number...never say ten..one was always the best choice..). My dad drew cartoons and had an extensive collection of his puns and side angle looks at life. Sometime, I'll have to post one for you to see. So much was good growing up, and yet so much was not.

This dual role he played in my life and the lives of my siblings was a complicated and frustrating thing. One moment he would be happy and joking the next the guilt would begin about which college I wanted to attend. He never forgot something that would make a good grudge and he never seemed to forgive those times he was proven wrong. It was difficult to ever feel like I had truly gained his approval. It makes for a strange jumble of childhood memories. For the most part, I try to model after those good times. I have learned the parts of me that try to be overcontrolling and overbearing can be toned down. Somehow, over the years, I have been able to make peace with his choices and his emotional and mental limitations. He could not be who I needed him to be much of the time. Instead, I try to remember he was just who I needed some of the time and the counts for an awful lot.

As an adult, I had the opportunity for several years to help him out at his office a couple of days a week. In that time, I was able to hear him discuss my brothers and sisters. He would share with me his thoughts on their life choices. He would talk about things they were doing that made him happy. Even though he never said it, I knew he was proud of them. I know they never got to hear that from him. I never really did get to hear it from him. I was the one listening and he never was very direct with his pleasant thoughts about you. I learned through his discussion of the others how much he really did love each of us. Even if he had trouble telling me he was proud of me too.

Five years ago, the family got together to celebrate my dad's and my niece's birthday. (It is also today.) Five years ago, this coming Thanksgiving, we had Thanksgiving dinner at my house. My dad and I sat for some time just talking. He really did enjoy when the family would get together with all the grandkids. He was sweet and kind and wonderful to each of his grandchildren. There, he was able to just be happy. Five years ago this coming Christmas time, December 21st, my father died from a massive heart attack. He and I about a week before his death spent a Friday working together and seeing a few patients. That was the last time I spoke with him while he was still conscious. We hugged at parting and said 'I love you.' We didn't normally part with the the I love yous but I am so grateful that we did that day. I know the last words I know he heard from me were, 'I love you'.

Losing my father, changed me in very direct and lasting ways. I have strong faith in an afterlife and what it has brought to him. However, he was a difficult man in life. Smoothing and settling myself and my life since as taken self analysis and prayer. I know others in the family are still going through some of that smoothing and settling even after these five years. I pray for them in this process.

I really miss him sometimes. I miss his big bear hugs. I miss his smell. I miss his ability to find the best deals at garage sales and thrift shops. I miss talking sports with him. I miss knowing in any trouble I was stuck in, I could turn to him and he would very happily do all he could to help. My children, especially my oldest, miss him very much too.

As television bombards us with remembering five years ago, take a moment and remember some of the more basic, important things. Don't get caught up in the anger, frustration and agony that will be thrown our way through every medium possible this week. Hug your family members, tell them you love them. Send your sympathies to those truly and horribly effected by the tragedies and then turn it all off and be with those you love. That is the best possible way to experience such an anniversary.

A Funny!

I was funny today.

I know it is shocking. I am not really a very funny person. I am more known for my glares and my eye-rolls then a good funny.

My husband. He is funny. He makes the kids laugh and laugh. He makes almost everyone laugh. He has even learned how to be funny..at the right times. Altho, he still will try funny when I do not want funny. We are a good match. My funny husband and his mostly not so funny wife.

I truly admire those who write funny blogs. Their personalities light up their writing like Christmas Lights. (I LOVE Christmas Lights, so this is a good thing.) I wish I could write like that about things that happen to me. But the best I think I get to..is thought provoking.

Today, while writing out my assignment for my class. I think I got funny. My 8 yr-old son thinks it is funny. He should know. He is very funny himself. He makes me laugh all the time.

Since I had this rare moment of -funny- I thought I'd share my little scene I wrote for my class. I had to write it twice from two POVs (points-of-view), but I am only going to give you one version of it. I hope you find it funny too. It should also make for interesting search engine fodder.

Third grade isn'’t for the weak and timid. Until that first day of lunch in my new school, I hadn't thought myself the easy target. I was eight but a small eight year-old with glasses. Through the morning classes I hadn't yet connected with a new friend and so I went to lunch alone. I dreaded sitting there by myself, but little did I know that was the least of my worries.

"“Hey butt-sniffer boy, do your glasses fog up when you sniff?"

I didn'’t turn around, I didn’t look. It couldn'’t be me that loud voice was calling to. I sat at a table in the corner of the busy cafeteria and tried to hide behind my milk carton.

"Butt-sniffer! Does your nose get stuck in the crack?"

I looked this time and a tall, thin boy a couple of tables away was standing and pointing at me. Several other children at the table were laughing, their hands covering their mouths full of food. One boy even had his milk dribble out of his nose as he tried hard to contain his laughter. I looked around for the teachers that had to be hearing this, but there was no adult to be seen.

I was confused. I didn't even know who this bullish boy was, let alone why he had singled me out. I quickly shoved a few more bites in my mouth and grabbed the rest and hurried to the trash can. Following me was the giggles and the whispered, "Butt-sniffer, that's funny. Do you think he really smells people'’s butts?"

I didn'’t think I could blush any redder. When it came time to toss out my uneaten lunch, my hands were shaking so badly I dropped half the food. I quickly bent to pick it up but I had delayed too long. He met me at the trash can.

"Hey butt-sniffer!"” He poked me hard in the back as I bent to get the last piece of trash. I fell forward against the trashcan and he bent down, hand ready to poke me again. Just then, I let out a loud, smelly fart. I froze. How could I have done THAT. It was only going to make the situation worse!

I stood and turned seeing my new bully gasping for air and stumbling back. The other children who had followed to see the fun were in shock. For a moment, it seemed the entire cafeteria was silent.

Then it hit me. I took a shaky breath and said loudly, "“Looks like you'’re the butt-sniffer. Did you enjoy it?"”

I turned and left before anyone else could speak and hurried through the hall to the playground. Two other boys who had been sitting at the bully’s table rushed to catch up to me. One threw his arm around my shoulders as he laughed so hard he had trouble breathing.

"That was so awesome! Did you plan that? I'’ve never seen anything so cool!"

Now off to curiculum night at the school (in the old days they just called it open house, much easier to spell) Then to my own class. {humming School Days....)

62 Odd Questions

I got this from Paisley Propaganda. She has been suffering through her last trimester in the horrid Arizona heat. Send her sympathy.



62 Odd Questions-------
[1] What is your middle name? Rebecca
[2] What color is your mailbox: silver-- It is actually in front of my house too.
[3] Last time you kissed someone: I kissed my son before his nap an hour ago...My husband always kisses me before he leaves in the morning.
[4] Have you ever hit a deer? No
[5] Do you have to drive over a bridge to get home? No, no bridge near my house.
[6] Who checks the mail in your house? Everyone..it never comes at the same time. 8 yr-old boy looks forward to the sports store ads tho and asks if he can check to see if it is here all afternoon.
[7] How many TVs are in your house? One
[8] Do you know anyone with the same ring tone as you? I do not have a cellphone.
[9] What do you do first in the morning? Turn on the radio.
[10] What brand is your printer? Lexmark
[11] Do you enjoy fighting with people? No (most of the time anyway)
[12] Is your hair naturally straight or curly?Mostly straight, a touch of wave
[13] Who was your kindergarten teacher? Mrs. Pop
[14] Are you taller than your mother? Yes
[15] Do you have a favorite word? Not really.
[16] Are you good? I am amazing.
[17] What do you do to get over a broken heart? It has been awhile. I think I just cried and cried.
[18] Do you have a deep dark secret? Yes and I'm not telling.
[19] Drink of choice: diet mt. dew
[20] Do you enjoy writing in colored pens? Very Much
[21] Does anything on your body hurt? My low back usually hurts..or my knees...and in case of migraine, my head+
[22] Do you often cry during movies? Not often. Moreso if I am PMS'ing
[23] Do you hate your life? No. I have a blessed life. I wish I could clearly see how blessed more often tho.
[24] Number of pets: none
[25] Are there any animals that scare you? Agressive dogs.
[26] Do you get mad easily? See PMS'ing above. No, not that easily, I get grumpy easier.
[27] Can't wait for? Cooler Temps.
[28] What is your biggest pet peeve? A dishonest child.
[29] Favorite song: Depends on my mood.
[31] Weather outside: Hot, well no, warm (only 95 right now) and humid..
[32] Most attractive quality about you: My smile
[33] You're in the mood for? A nap
[34] Do any of your friends have kids? For the most part, yes
[35] If you could have a threesome with any 2 celebrities, who? As long as we just played scrabble, I'd pick Robert Sarver and Josh Byrnes. After wowing them with my scrabble prowress I am sure they'd gift me with season tickets.
[36] Do you have any friends? Yes, wow glad I didn't have to answer NO to that one.
[37] Do you have any mean friends? No
[38] What is the ugliest color in your opinion? I don't really see colors as ugly..just that there are appropriate color choices in all decorating, clothing decisions. Such as I do not wear sunny bright yellow, but otherwise I have nothing against the color.
[39] Have you ever liked someone who all your friends couldn't stand? Not that I can remember.
[40] Have you ever felt like driving off a cliff? Yes, but I didn't...(obvious yes?)
[41] Have you ever been fired from a job? Nope
[42] What year was your house built? 1968
[43] When was the last time you slept in someone else’s bed? Last March I stayed in a hotel.
[44] What brand are the pant/jeans you're wearing? Brand? I have five children and a limited budget. The pants I am wearing I've had for the past five years and were bought at w@lmart.
[45] How tall are you? 5’10”
[46] What is the closest green object? My diet mt dew can
[47] What is on your feet? I have pretty peach nail polish on my toe nails. Otherwise, they are bare.
[48] Do you always wear underwear? Yes.
[49] Do you want to have kids? I have enough now, thank you.
[50] Who is the last person who you would expect to be gay? My husband.
[51] Do you know how to draw? I do ok, but I have a brother and sister who just rock the art side of things.
[52] What’s your mother's middle name? She doesn't have one.
[53] Stupidest movie you ever saw: Anger Management
[54] Do you collect comic books? No
[55] Do you look like your dad? Yeah I guess I do.
[56] Do you have any TV shows on DVD? Not unless my husband bought something I don't know about.
[57] Are you wearing make up? Some light powder...so yes.
[58] Do you have a tattoo? No.
[59] You win the lottery and you: I am shocked because I don't buy lottery tickets LOL. I wait for the letter of recantation.
[60] How many pairs of underwear do you have? I don't know. Enough.
[61] Are you hungry at the moment? No, but I am thirsty. The soda can is empty.
[62] Favorite movie of all time: I don't have just one. My husband is more the movie buff than me anyway.

If you liked this one and decide to do it, let me know, please. I'd really like to read yours.

All's Okay

I had a nice weekend. Well, a nice weekend minus the sick kids anyway. Saturday was spent with family. Time with my family for my neice's baptism and time with my husband's family for a birthday party. Best part of it all was that I was prepared ahead and didn't have to do any last minute gift shopping. The kids all showered early in the day and so when it was time to get ready, it all went smoothly. See..a couple of feverish kids by the end of the day could not ruin such a smooth flow of things.

In fact, Deborah my 6 yr-old was one of the feverish children. Conversations never seem to end with Deborah. Discussing her homework this afternoon (for she is all well now and went to school) took three times as long as her actually doing the homework. (She sang while doing the homework.) Deborah is a wonderful, delightful, enthusiastic, sweet handful. So, when she was sick and stayed home from church with Daddy I cannot say I missed her. My mom took care of the 2 yr-old, the baby was sick and home with Daddy too, and I sat and listened and enjoyed church. It was as if someone had smacked me with the peace stick. All the rest of the day, I felt calm and relaxed. (Please note that the baby being home was equally to blame for the calmness as the 6 yr-old, equally, not moreso.)

Monday, I took the heathy kids to the zoo with my sister and her kids. Again, sans Deborah it was a much quieter trip. She didn't seem to mind missing it either as Daddy gave her ample computer games time. We had a lot of fun. We saw maybe a half dozen animals. See, it was hot by the time we got there. I was running behind, for very good reasons, so when we arrived it was hot and HUMID. Thank you hurricane John. Still, we had fun. They have a water lagoon area where water spurts up from the ground and the kids run around and play in it. Very much worth the trip. In the past, I might have felt guilty for going to the zoo, seeing a few animals and then spending the rest of the time letting the kids play in the water, but not anymore. Zoo memberships help because I reason, we'll just look at the animals next time.

The best part of the weekend? I procrastinated doing my homework. After all, I wasn't at the computer all weekend reading blogs, why would I go there to write something else? I do, however, have ideas for the assignment which keeps the anxiety at bay.

So, while things are not exciting and amazing over here...they are ok. I'll take okay for as long as I can get. Amazing can just wait over there with bad and distressing.

My Old Nemesis

I remember a conversation I had with my mom when I was 12 or 13. Her words are still very clear in my thoughts and they have often returned to me over the years as I encounter new or difficult situations. Now, this doesn't mean I am always so diligent with following the advice, but it has certainly helped me.

It was an odd conversation. One that you can't really script of predict. The family was all sitting in our van waiting for my dad who had run into a store or a house or something. So, we were sitting, waiting, bored. We started asking my mom questions. I don't remember what the other kids asked or said, but my question was (something like..):

"Mom, what is my biggest fault or weakness?"

Whoa! As a mom now myself I think, my poor mom, what a horrible question to have thrown at you by an emotional young teen. However, my mom being the amazing woman she is, had the right answer. See, I wouldn't have believed her if she had said nothing, you're wonderful, or if she had said something about keeping my room clean. What she told me was (something like..):

"You sometimes give up and don't try something new because you are afraid. Your fear of failure prevents you from having some interesting experiences."

Isn't that an amazing answer? It was so totally not on my radar as one of my biggest weaknesses. I didn't realize I was choosing not to do things like that. As I thought about it afterward, I knew she was correct and decided I needed to stop letting my fear determine my choices. I haven't been perfect with this but there is a whole list of things I may never have enjoyed through high school if I had not become aware of this limitation.

As I've become more self-analytical and self-aware, I have come to understand there is a lot more to the fear than fear of failure. I have a fear of disappointing other people which is a bit out of proportion to what should be, sometimes. So, in a way I fear a form of social failure.

Yesterday, as I was finally finishing up my homework for my writing class, I realized this old fear had been suffocating me all week as anxiety ruled me and I didn't write anything. In fact, after I had gotten the small scene written, I still had to call my husband over to read through it and tell me it was okay that I wrote about something rather unpleasant. That I wasn't disappointing him. Logic was screaming at me telling me it was crazy for me to think I wasn't allowed to write about anything I wanted. All the while, my heart was trembling in irrational fear. The combination was rather nauseating.

In the time it took my husband to read through the paper, it came to me. My mom's words echoed through my mind once again. I have recommitted myself to not be afraid of creating. I can write about whatever I want and it DOES NOT have to be perfect the first time. (I tend to over edit as I write.) I think I have found my writing nemesis. My self editor. I will continue to tell myself I am free to do what I want with this. I do not have to fear disappointing my teacher. In fact, she would likely be more disappointed if I overly censored myself.

((As as side note, the scene what supposed to emphasize characterizations. In class, we were put into groups and then the assignments were collected, then passed back out randomly. Each group read the four scenes they were given and chose the best one that followed the assignment to read to the class. The group that read mine chose to read it and I received some great positive feedback. If I had listened to my fears, I never would have turned it in and I would have missed that great opportunity. My mom is SO right sometimes. ;-]))